i like talking to people in fact, but I HATE gossip and grudges, and I HATE people teliinig ME about them. Which they do, even when I politely that I don't want to talk about it!
I hate politics inside the church. The clicky groups, and the low talking that stops when youcome close! Its CHURCH for crying out loud! Your SUPPOSED to have fellowship with those who come, not pair up with your friends and talk about things your not comfortable talking to any one else about! That's what PHONES are for, thats what EMAILS are for, thats what the PASTORS are for, darn it!
I'm also sick of a certain person who shall remain nameless who keeps critisizing MY faith - MY FAITH for goodness sake_ simply because I don't believe that speaking in tongues is a condition of salvation. Darn her! I've told her over and over again, the way I believe you are saved is by accepting Jesus Christ as your Lord and Saviour, and asking Him to take away your sins and cleanse usfrom all unrightiousness, and He PROMISED He would in His word! Her belief system in my eyes is flawed because it relies on something that . . . . well you know what? I'm not going to go into that, it does not matter, and I'm not offended by her faith, nor am I intimidated by it. I know my faith is stronger than hers as I have spent quite a bit of time with this person, and even now retain her friendship, and I won't say, nor will I have any one else say anything nasty about her. I just feel mighty offended that she claims I am destined for hell, when she is so darned hypocritical and judgemental -- and THEN she claims she never was!!!!! It drives me to tears! How dare she, when all I've ever done is support her and her old belief, talked her through problems, given her a shoulder to cry on (which she has done, oh yes indeedy!!!!), and she goes and says that!!
I am also mightily discusted with certain husbands who stay up till midnight reading comics on the comtuper, and then claim the next day they are too tired to do anything and be blowed with everything else! Well you know what? Right back at him.
Whats more, I'm so upset that I keep hitting the wrong dang keys on this flipping computer, and, you know what, I reckon its all the computers fault. Maybe its shifting its keys around to see how far it can push mebefore I snap!! Aurrrr!!
. . . .
Actually, when I write it down, tha last bit is pretty funny.
LOL, maybe the compter isn't to blame, but naturally when I feel like this it cant be MY fault . . .can it?
When we first moved here to Morwell, we sought out a Baptist church, because that was what we were used to, and even then I was unhappy with the way that type of church behaved as a whole, but hey, you know the whole comfort zone thing, etc, etc. Anyway, we ended up leaving because they changed pastors, and the new pastor preached a Jesus I didn't know. (apparently the new Jesus is supposed to be your buddy, and life is sweet in Him dude!) Neither Michael nor I were comfortable, even before that, as we were getting no support as a family in Christ, nor as a young family in a new church with very young active children, if you can imagine where I'm going with this . . . Well, we left, and were naturally feeling very forlorn, and then we discovered a little church not five minutes walk away, and we decided, 'what the hay?' and stopped in. The people there were AMAZING! They welcomed us like long lost treasure, and Michael and I were stunned. It was only the week after that we discovered that it was in fact an open Brethren church! Now, I have to admit that I would never have stepped into that church if I'd known that, but I truly believe that the Lord lead us there in that matter, and I love these folk and am closer to them than any I've gone to church with before. (its not then I had my winge at, anyway, its two families that are part of our new merged church, and, if I'm gonna be honest about it, I have no business feeling the way I do about them, as they are a minority, and I honestly believe they don't know any better. That doesn't make me feel any better when I'm blue, but it helps in my saner moments
).Yes, I understand that cliques are common. That's what lead to the discussion I'm so disgusted with with the friend I mentioned . . . Before our church merged with the little Baptist, it was a small Open Brethren group, and there were no cliques, and Michael and I were so happy, because what we were experiencing at this church we never had before! I mean, it was like we were the most important thing that these people had ever come across, but that feeling was spread amongst themselves as well, so it was not uncomfortable. I just have to get over it, but I am half afraid that if I fall into the habit of moving around the people I know will welcome my presence, that I will be no better that those people who I resent!
To be perfectly honest, the stuff at
church shouldn't bother me, as its only a small group of people who do
it, and they are Baptists, who are known for that sort of behaviour, and
I know its not personal, but we left the Baptist congerigation because
of stuff like that, and since our church has merged with the little
Baptist church I have been noticing the patterns. As I'm out in Sunday
School every week it does not usually affect me, as I'm not there, and
I'm very thankful for that, but I think I'm quite sensitive at the
minute . . .
I am a very open an honest person to a point, in that, what you see is what you get, and if you want more you have to work for it. But what I give initially is what a lot of people will not show to strangers and new people, prefering to keep it hidden till they know the person better. As I work differently I am classified as a lot of peoples 'friend', and while I do not mind this, I must admit that I do not put many people in that catigory for myself, as I am a lot to handle. I have very full emotions and needs, and I know that what I would demand of some one I call 'friend', not many would be willing to give! Hense me feeling a little off balance when a person dumps on me, or attacks me, and I know I am unable to rely on them to take the same from ME if the roles were reversed.
I am a very open an honest person to a point, in that, what you see is what you get, and if you want more you have to work for it. But what I give initially is what a lot of people will not show to strangers and new people, prefering to keep it hidden till they know the person better. As I work differently I am classified as a lot of peoples 'friend', and while I do not mind this, I must admit that I do not put many people in that catigory for myself, as I am a lot to handle. I have very full emotions and needs, and I know that what I would demand of some one I call 'friend', not many would be willing to give! Hense me feeling a little off balance when a person dumps on me, or attacks me, and I know I am unable to rely on them to take the same from ME if the roles were reversed.
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